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code_slayer_bkk

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Relationships are a complicated thing I find at times .... you know what someone is doing wrong .. and you end up doing wrong things in your quest for them to get help .. because you cannot understand why they won't take your hand for the help you offer ...

I got Beach gal to talk to her ( maybe it will make a difference -- not sure though ) .... Beach gal isn't jealous or holds no angst against this gal or even knows this gal ... I asked Beach gal to help -- she will help ... Beach gal knows I am committed to her .. so no problem ..

Once again, very hard for me to ever give up on someone I consider to be a friend ... take it as it comes .. day by day

 

Edited by code_slayer_bkk
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On 5/26/2019 at 4:06 PM, Krapow said:

It's especially hard when it's family, usually parents getting blackmailed, gimme the money or I will go rob, steal, sell my body, whatever …

But tough love is required, it needs brought to a head, as it's only enabling. 

But as I say, it's hard when there are emotions involved. 

Spot on... The reason I've buggered off to Sweden and Thailand for 6 weeks is because I can't cope living with a hardened drug addict. My neice who is 30 years old lives (or should I say exists) with my 78 year old mom. No matter how many times we argue about money going to my neice my mother caves in not understanding where the money will go. 

And the said neice has visited my own daughter just yesterday causing trouble. My mother has been away on holiday for a week and that cnut of an addict has opened all my mail and my mother's. 

No idea what to do with her. 

To all those who've never known or lived with a drug addict... Think yourself lucky. 

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13 minutes ago, Aqualung said:

Spot on... The reason I've buggered off to Sweden and Thailand for 6 weeks is because I can't cope living with a hardened drug addict. My neice who is 30 years old lives (or should I say exists) with my 78 year old mom. No matter how many times we argue about money going to my neice my mother caves in not understanding where the money will go. 

And the said neice has visited my own daughter just yesterday causing trouble. My mother has been away on holiday for a week and that cnut of an addict has opened all my mail and my mother's. 

No idea what to do with her. 

To all those who've never known or lived with a drug addict... Think yourself lucky. 

I totally understand .... I grew up around addicts .. maybe that is why I have never become one ... the fucking damage they can cause .... all over a needle in the arm ... or a couple tokes off of a pipe ... Brooklyn was destroyed ( the same with Queens, Manhattatan, the Bronx ) with heroin when I was growing up .. totally destroyed .. f**k me .. dead people with a needle still stuck in their arm lying in the streets dead .. 100% true

But sometimes ... you can never give up on a person .. even through all of the chaos or damage ... sucks big time ... that they cannot ever recognize the love you have or are offering

 

Edited by code_slayer_bkk
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55 minutes ago, Aqualung said:

Spot on... The reason I've buggered off to Sweden and Thailand for 6 weeks is because I can't cope living with a hardened drug addict. My neice who is 30 years old lives (or should I say exists) with my 78 year old mom. No matter how many times we argue about money going to my neice my mother caves in not understanding where the money will go. 

And the said neice has visited my own daughter just yesterday causing trouble. My mother has been away on holiday for a week and that cnut of an addict has opened all my mail and my mother's. 

No idea what to do with her. 

To all those who've never known or lived with a drug addict... Think yourself lucky. 

I am a drug addict, and will always be a drug addict, albeit one that hasn't used drugs coming on 20 years.

It's very, very hard when emotions are involved as said. But you really have to be cruel to be kind, you can't make it easy for them to keep doing what they are doing, too comfortable, or there is little motivation to change, and they will most likely continue with all the destructive behaviours, both to them and everyone else they come into contact with. 

I've had these conversations with family members many times, trying to get them to understand they are not helping the person or the situation. But it's so hard for say a mother to hear her daughter say give me the money or i'm going to go prostitute myself to whomever to get it, especially if they don't have an understanding of addiction, why, what's going on etc. I understand that. 

Without knowing the full story, I'd be saying an ultimatum needs to made to your niece, go get help or you're on your own, find somewhere else to live, means to get care of yourself. It needs brought to a head. 

That said, unless the person is ready and wants to change, it won't work. 

Addiction touches so many lives, not just the addict/alcoholic. 

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32 minutes ago, Krapow said:

I am a drug addict, and will always be a drug addict, albeit one that hasn't used drugs coming on 20 years.

It's very, very hard when emotions are involved as said. But you really have to be cruel to be kind, you can't make it easy for them to keep doing what they are doing, too comfortable, or there is little motivation to change, and they will most likely continue with all the destructive behaviours, both to them and everyone else they come into contact with. 

I've had these conversations with family members many times, trying to get them to understand they are not helping the person or the situation. But it's so hard for say a mother to hear her daughter say give me the money or i'm going to go prostitute myself to whomever to get it, especially if they don't have an understanding of addiction, why, what's going on etc. I understand that. 

Without knowing the full story, I'd be saying an ultimatum needs to made to your niece, go get help or you're on your own, find somewhere else to live, means to get care of yourself. It needs brought to a head. 

That said, unless the person is ready and wants to change, it won't work. 

Addiction touches so many lives, not just the addict/alcoholic. 

It's difficult for me as I don't own the house so the rules are not mine to lay down. All I can do is try to make sure my mother isn't played like a fiddle which is very difficult because I don't enjoy my time there. 

All I know is that every feckin day has some sort of drama. All this when my neice in question doesn't even have work to worry about. I'll try to send a link to her story as it made mainstream news in the UK tabloids. Not pretty reading I can assure you and despite many times she's promised change, it never happens. 

I'd never thought this of a family member before but the best thing to happen to her is jail. Rehab hasn't worked and if things don't change soon it's not her that will ne rehab, it will be me or my old mum. 

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Latest From mail online. 

Hannah Hawke, 25, left her six-year-old son and three-year-old daughter at home - leaving the door unlocked so they could 'run out if there was a fire'

She took her baby with her as she went to pick up her boyfriend - despite having consumed several glasses of wine

She then tested positive for cocaine during two rehabilitation meetings

Hawke, of Waterfoot, Lancashire, was released with a compliance order

Hannah Hawke, 25, avoided jail for child neglect after she left her children alone and drove to pick up her boyfriend after drinking several glasses of wine

A would-be glamour model who left her children home alone while she went on a 3am drink driving jaunt with her baby has been spared jail for the second time - despite failing a drugs test. 

Hannah Hawke, 25, from Waterfoot, Lancashire, avoided jail for child neglect in January after she drove to pick up her boyfriend after drinking several glasses of wine.

A court heard she left her six year old son and three year old daughter at home - leaving the front door unlocked so they could 'run out if there was a fire' - and strapped her 12-month-old baby into the car seat.

But just a month after getting an 18 month community order with a condition she go on a rehabilitation course, Hawke repeatedly ignored curfews - staying out for seven hours on one occasion and then 16 hours during another. 

She also tested positive for cocaine during two rehabilitation meetings then failed to turn up at all.

Hawke pleaded guilty to failing to comply with her curfew at Burnley Crown Court. 

Letting her go with a compliance order Mr Recorder Mark Ainsworth said: 'Nobody wants to have you come back before the courts and sent to prison but if you don't comply with orders we have no choice, it is a devastating prospect.

'I'm giving you one last chance, if you come back you really should expect at that stage to go to prison. 

Whilst there is an element of punishment here it is also there to help you.

'I honestly hope I don't see you again, if I do expect the response to be more severe. 

'The original order was put in place to punish you and help you to put your life back in order, put you in a greater position for the care and control of your children. 

The purpose of the order was not just to punish you but to assist you.'

Earlier for Hawke, defence counsel David Farley said: 'She has attended court very apologetically. 

A court heard  Hawke left her six year old son and three year old daughter at home - leaving the front door unlocked so they could 'run out if there was a fire' - and strapped her 12 month old baby into the car seat

Just a month after getting an 18 month community order with a condition she go on a rehabilitation course, Hawke repeatedly ignored curfews - staying out for seven hours on one occasion and then 16 hours during another. She also tested positive for cocaine during two rehabilitation meetings then failed to turn up at all

'She did start well and with all good intentions to try and do the order and hopefully convince the authorities that she is a suitable mother, her children are seven, four and 15 months.'

He added that her contact with her children had been reduced to three hours supervised per week and that she was 'very upset '.

'She lives with her grandmother who she doesn't know what she would do without her. In the meantime her uncle moved in. 

'That was an unhappy living scenario,' said counsel.

Edited by Aqualung
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16 minutes ago, Aqualung said:

434shares

417 comments

Latest From mail online. 

Hannah Hawke, 25, left her six-year-old son and three-year-old daughter at home - leaving the door unlocked so they could 'run out if there was a fire'

She took her baby with her as she went to pick up her boyfriend - despite having consumed several glasses of wine

She then tested positive for cocaine during two rehabilitation meetings

Hawke, of Waterfoot, Lancashire, was released with a compliance order

Hannah Hawke, 25, avoided jail for child neglect after she left her children alone and drove to pick up her boyfriend after drinking several glasses of wine

A would-be glamour model who left her children home alone while she went on a 3am drink driving jaunt with her baby has been spared jail for the second time - despite failing a drugs test. 

Hannah Hawke, 25, from Waterfoot, Lancashire, avoided jail for child neglect in January after she drove to pick up her boyfriend after drinking several glasses of wine.

A court heard she left her six year old son and three year old daughter at home - leaving the front door unlocked so they could 'run out if there was a fire' - and strapped her 12-month-old baby into the car seat.

But just a month after getting an 18 month community order with a condition she go on a rehabilitation course, Hawke repeatedly ignored curfews - staying out for seven hours on one occasion and then 16 hours during another. 

She also tested positive for cocaine during two rehabilitation meetings then failed to turn up at all.

Hawke pleaded guilty to failing to comply with her curfew at Burnley Crown Court. 

Letting her go with a compliance order Mr Recorder Mark Ainsworth said: 'Nobody wants to have you come back before the courts and sent to prison but if you don't comply with orders we have no choice, it is a devastating prospect.

'I'm giving you one last chance, if you come back you really should expect at that stage to go to prison. 

Whilst there is an element of punishment here it is also there to help you.

'I honestly hope I don't see you again, if I do expect the response to be more severe. 

'The original order was put in place to punish you and help you to put your life back in order, put you in a greater position for the care and control of your children. 

The purpose of the order was not just to punish you but to assist you.'

Earlier for Hawke, defence counsel David Farley said: 'She has attended court very apologetically. 

A court heard  Hawke left her six year old son and three year old daughter at home - leaving the front door unlocked so they could 'run out if there was a fire' - and strapped her 12 month old baby into the car seat

Just a month after getting an 18 month community order with a condition she go on a rehabilitation course, Hawke repeatedly ignored curfews - staying out for seven hours on one occasion and then 16 hours during another. She also tested positive for cocaine during two rehabilitation meetings then failed to turn up at all

'She did start well and with all good intentions to try and do the order and hopefully convince the authorities that she is a suitable mother, her children are seven, four and 15 months.'

He added that her contact with her children had been reduced to three hours supervised per week and that she was 'very upset '.

'She lives with her grandmother who she doesn't know what she would do without her. In the meantime her uncle moved in. 

'That was an unhappy living scenario,' said counsel.

Sad story to hear,but unfortunately that is the life of an addict.Nothing comes before the high.

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8 minutes ago, galenkia said:

Sad story to hear,but unfortunately that is the life of an addict.Nothing comes before the high.

3 kids to 3 different fathers including a Pakistani drug baron. All kids in care now for 4 +, years and despite all the tears and bleating to get them back no matter what....... Its all failed because drugs come first. 

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2 minutes ago, Aqualung said:

3 kids to 3 different fathers including a Pakistani drug baron. All kids in care now for 4 +, years and despite all the tears and bleating to get them back no matter what....... Its all failed because drugs come first. 

You can try as much as possible but some people are pretty much beyond help.Its sad to have to admit that when its your own family.Addiction is a bastard,just destroys so many lives.I have lost so much time to it myself.Hopefully one day she can conquer her demons mate.

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2 minutes ago, galenkia said:

You can try as much as possible but some people are pretty much beyond help.Its sad to have to admit that when its your own family.Addiction is a bastard,just destroys so many lives.I have lost so much time to it myself.Hopefully one day she can conquer her demons mate.

Tbh G I really don't give a f**k now. My parents retirements were ruined by having to care for from 14 years old. My late brother, her dad couldn't cope with her and the same with her mother. 

All I want is a bit of peace and quiet for my mother. To see her grandkids etc. 

What a fucking mess. 

I can't sort it out for sure... But there's going to be be some strong words when I get home... Another waste of time of course. 

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1 hour ago, Aqualung said:

It was unhappy living scenario as I won't put up with her shit concerning my mother. 

Sorry for the thread f**k code. 

No Bro ... f**k no .. it is good you can share your feelings ...

But, jail will not help her .. I spent more than 3 years in a federal lock up ( initially sentenced to over 60 years -- then dropped to a zip 6 for over 80 keys of H ) ------ ( the first year on a bus dumping me in any local jail that the bus stopped at .. they wouldn't even take the shaffles of off my legs while I spent then night on a bare cell floor .. then off on the bus again the next day ) .. that is called the " diesel trip ) .. especially designed for people that would NOT snitch ..

When I was finally off the bus in Leavenworth there were more drugs in this place than anyone could imagine ... then they transferred me to a couple of other maxim federal facilities ( Pelican Bay was the first ) and there were even more drugs in this place ....

I think just put this person out of their misery .. easy to do if you have some guts .. sounds to me she has been given an overload of help which she still refuses .. f**k it .. put a dying dog down

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1 hour ago, Aqualung said:

3 kids to 3 different fathers including a Pakistani drug baron. All kids in care now for 4 +, years and despite all the tears and bleating to get them back no matter what....... Its all failed because drugs come first. 

You’re  definitely between a rock and a hard place mate, but your mum has to be your first concern, because it seems your niece is never going to change her ways. If you’re not careful, she will bleed your mum dry for drug money and not bat an eyelid. 

Those poor kids will never have a proper life and will probably be shoved from pillar to post until they are old enough to be kicked out of care, all because of her addiction/love of drugs.  

I’ve no advice to give, because I’ve never been unfortunate enough to have to go through what you’re going through now, other than to get her out of your mums house. 

You’ve been dealt a rotten hand mate and I wish you luck in whatever you decide to do. 👍

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2 hours ago, Aqualung said:

It's difficult for me as I don't own the house so the rules are not mine to lay down. All I can do is try to make sure my mother isn't played like a fiddle which is very difficult because I don't enjoy my time there. 

All I know is that every feckin day has some sort of drama. All this when my neice in question doesn't even have work to worry about. I'll try to send a link to her story as it made mainstream news in the UK tabloids. Not pretty reading I can assure you and despite many times she's promised change, it never happens. 

I'd never thought this of a family member before but the best thing to happen to her is jail. Rehab hasn't worked and if things don't change soon it's not her that will ne rehab, it will be me or my old mum. 

I hear you.

And the drama will  most likely continue, and you, your mum and whoever else will continue to get sucked into all her chaos, as you are now. 

I read the link, forced treatment or Rehab very rarely works, people have to want it, not coerced. For some it does switch a light on, but few and far between. But Courts are under huge pressure to give out DRR's (Drug Rehabilitation Requirements) as the jails are full to  busting, it costs so  much to keep someone in jail, and jail can be and is just a revolving door. But,  Jail wouldn't be the worst outcome for next time, as there will always be a 'next time', would give your mum some respite, a chance to try to get her to see she's not helping the situation. Plus the niece would get detoxed. But detox is just detox, the physical stuff. It's the mental addiction that needs dealt with, and that will only happen if the addict or alcoholic allows it and wants it to happen. 

It needs tough love, your mum needs to understand she's not helping the situation, she's enabling the niece to continue with her 'existence' as you put it. Not to feel guilty, it's not her fault, and the niece makes that decision every single time she uses drug, her, no one else. She makes that choice, as there is always a choice. There is help, from structured Drug treatment, to NA Programmes, to everything in between. But your niece chooses to use drugs, rather than use the help to sort herself out, she doesn't want to or is not ready to get clean. And to be honest, why would she, if she has always somewhere to stay, someone to give her money, she'll continue doing it. 

I put my parents through so much shite. My Dad was a Prison Officer, I was in and out of Prison, my mum worked in a psychiatric hospital with wards that dealt with addictions, I was in and out. I had a good upbringing, well cared for and loved, respectable well thought of family. I was using, dealing, robbing from them, in and out of jail, embarrassing the f**k outta them, overdoses, cardiac arrests, them not knowing from one day to the next if I was gonna be alive or dead. Horrible, horrible stuff, shameful, but that's where my addiction took me. 

That said, i'm near 20 years clean and sober, have a great life, have made my amends to my family, and know they are very proud of me and what I have become. 

There's always hope mate, always hope. I know it doesn't feel like it now, and it's horrible some of the stuff she is doing, and she'll no doubt know that, but it's her addiction. 

Really hope you bump this thread sometime in the future saying she sorted herself out.

 

Edited by Krapow
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On 5/25/2019 at 7:05 PM, Gary said:

In all my years here, the worst addiction is NOT drugs or alcohol. It is gambling. I have seen girls give up drugs but it appears that gambling is a permanent addiction.

I have to agree. Gambling is the worst addiction I have seen.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I've known a few girls who did it bad on the Ice in Thailand.

Two I knew most, one went one way, one the other.

First was a hot gogo girl bitd and got well sponsored by a guy who gave her a condo, good amount to live on etc for her to quit the industry which she did. The two problems with this were that her sponsor didn't live in Thailand full time and she got bored/missed the fun life and so on. She wasn't using at this point but he caught her cheating and ended the relationship with her, kicked her out of the condo etc. She went back to the bar work but had put on a few KG and that's when she started using to help lose weight. I met her a few months after this point but didn't find out about her using until a while later. I stopped seeing her when she delayed a meeting one day with me for hours, turned up obviously having been well on it for god know how many days/nights and was a mess, that's when the full extent of her issues became clear. She lost the cheap room she had been renting, lost her job, wasn't internet savvy so couldn't FL using CL or TF etc like other girls do. I think she was basically living on the street or near to it when I saw her next randomly one morning. I bought her coffee, food, paid for two weeks rent on the by-the-night cheap room she was staying in when she had money. After this I didn't see or hear from her for a good while and when I asked other girls and Mama's etc if she was still around a year or so later none of them knew where she was. She popped up in the Middle-East, I guess she got trafficked out there but had managed to work off her debt and was doing well for herself, totally off the gear, which I guess is near impossible to get where she was living. AFAIK she is still doing OK.

Second was a v attractive girl who worked around all the types of job in the industry over a good few years. She was using for many years which I didn't know about but kept it under control well until a couple of years ago when she went off the rails for unknown reasons and descended into a bad state which is when her habit became clear to see. Don't know what happened to her, she went off the grid.

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On 5/27/2019 at 7:29 AM, code_slayer_bkk said:

I totally understand .... I grew up around addicts .. maybe that is why I have never become one ... the fucking damage they can cause .... all over a needle in the arm ... or a couple tokes off of a pipe ... Brooklyn was destroyed ( the same with Queens, Manhattatan, the Bronx ) with heroin when I was growing up .. totally destroyed .. f**k me .. dead people with a needle still stuck in their arm lying in the streets dead .. 100% true

But sometimes ... you can never give up on a person .. even through all of the chaos or damage ... sucks big time ... that they cannot ever recognize the love you have or are offering

 

Man.… Bowie was great.

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  • 2 weeks later...

OK my Sweden /Thailand /Sweden trip is almost done. Heading home on Tuesday to try to clear up another mess associated with my drug addict neice. 

Had a call from my mother today (after she had calmed herself down) and an Asian taxi driver turned up at the house demanding money for an unpaid taxi fare by my neice. She's done this on numerous occasions BTW so nothing fresh there. But what pissed me off was the reaction of the driver to my mother. Shouting and screaming and then kicked the glass panelled front door so hard that's it cannot now be opened or closed. When my gutsy old mum confronted the guy... Threats made about making sure she watches her house!!!! 

Police called and want to speak to my neice aswell as my mother. 

Now I know it's not my neice fault that this idiot of a taxi driver decided to cause criminal damage and threaten a 78 year old woman but it would never have happened if she hadn't done a runner from the taxi. 

I'll update on Thursday after I've found out what the police have advised and after I've visited the taxi office owner and hopefully the offending driver. 

New front doors aren't fxxxing cheap you know. 

 

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"Once again, very hard for me to ever give up on someone I consider to be a friend ... take it as it comes .. day by day"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Joe

it's called pick and stick

regards

grayray

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7 hours ago, Aqualung said:

OK my Sweden /Thailand /Sweden trip is almost done. Heading home on Tuesday to try to clear up another mess associated with my drug addict neice. 

Had a call from my mother today (after she had calmed herself down) and an Asian taxi driver turned up at the house demanding money for an unpaid taxi fare by my neice. She's done this on numerous occasions BTW so nothing fresh there. But what pissed me off was the reaction of the driver to my mother. Shouting and screaming and then kicked the glass panelled front door so hard that's it cannot now be opened or closed. When my gutsy old mum confronted the guy... Threats made about making sure she watches her house!!!! 

Police called and want to speak to my neice aswell as my mother. 

Now I know it's not my neice fault that this idiot of a taxi driver decided to cause criminal damage and threaten a 78 year old woman but it would never have happened if she hadn't done a runner from the taxi. 

I'll update on Thursday after I've found out what the police have advised and after I've visited the taxi office owner and hopefully the offending driver. 

New front doors aren't fxxxing cheap you know. 

 

Feel for you Aqualung you are doing what any good son would do for their mum. 

Good luck  👌

 

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21 hours ago, Aqualung said:

OK my Sweden /Thailand /Sweden trip is almost done. Heading home on Tuesday to try to clear up another mess associated with my drug addict neice. 

Had a call from my mother today (after she had calmed herself down) and an Asian taxi driver turned up at the house demanding money for an unpaid taxi fare by my neice. She's done this on numerous occasions BTW so nothing fresh there. But what pissed me off was the reaction of the driver to my mother. Shouting and screaming and then kicked the glass panelled front door so hard that's it cannot now be opened or closed. When my gutsy old mum confronted the guy... Threats made about making sure she watches her house!!!! 

Police called and want to speak to my neice aswell as my mother. 

Now I know it's not my neice fault that this idiot of a taxi driver decided to cause criminal damage and threaten a 78 year old woman but it would never have happened if she hadn't done a runner from the taxi. 

I'll update on Thursday after I've found out what the police have advised and after I've visited the taxi office owner and hopefully the offending driver. 

New front doors aren't fxxxing cheap you know. 

 

As I mentioned before, tough love, you and your mother need to basically give an ultimatum to  cut ties if she doesn't sort herself out. She almost definitely won't, as she knows your mum has always caved before, so everyone needs to stick to their guns, stop enabling. Force the issue with no guilt, because all that's currently being done is allowing her to continue her lifestyle. 

I know what I'm saying above will be very, very hard for various reasons, but it needs to be done for everyone.

Good luck, but nothing will work unless she is or gets that bad she is willing to accept help, the issue needs forced. 

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  • 7 months later...

OK so we are nearly 8 months on since my last post on Codes thread here. (hope you don't mind BTW). And since Krapow asked me to update I will. 

First I will Will say this..... I've slapped a woman for the first time in my life. Not proud of it and don't want to repeat it but did it only to shock and not to cause pain. 

Second, here's a monetary list of what I know I've had to pay out over the last couple of years because of living in the same house as a crackhead. This list does not include the £1000s my 79 year old mum has shelled out to the dirty little cnut. 

BTW, this is about my niece and not intended to upset any bm on here or anywhere who's had an addiction themselves. 

1) my Audi taken without consent (both sets of keys were with me in Sweden but she found a plastic clone key within my Audi handbook). She was arrested on the M62 in West Yorkshire at 3 am for having no insurance. My car was recovered and I had to travel via taxi to Bradford to get it back. I found out about this whilst in Sweden so you can imagine the costs!!!!..... £60 taxi fare. £370 to release my car. £750 worth of damage to both drivers side doors and wing which required 2 new doors and a re-spray. Interior was like a pig sty with pot noodles and vomit stuck to the carpets. Valet cost £20.

Total = £1200.

2)an old BMW of mine sold by her whilst I was away on holiday. No log book left for me and of course the speeding fines etc came to me. That was sorted by writing to the dvla and the Lancashire Constabulary. Car was sold for £375 and I didn't receive a penny. 

Total =£375.

3)car recovery of the above said BMW when she decided to nick my keys and go hunting for her fix and got arrested again. 

Total =£214.

4)tried to learn my lesson whilst visiting my wife in Sweden for new year. Hid my car. Any monies banked etc. Got home early February to find my brand new hair clippers missing £40.Barbour jacket missing (newish) £200.my Xmas gift from my mother missing, bottle of whisky and wine £20.

Total =£260.

The above doesn't include what I've given her just to get her out of the house for peace and quiet. So just over £2000 of my savings and she doesn't give a shit. 

I'll leave it here for now. Next installment is the abuse of my mother and visits from plod. 

Like Krapow has said. Tough love should have been applied long ago but it's not easy to apply. I've had advice from the police and Age Concern and it looks like the next step is to serve my neice with an injunction to stop her visiting our address.... Will she take notice.... Not a chance. 

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