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Funniest Joke I Ever Heard

Evil Penevil

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This joke is so side-splittingly funny I just had to share it with everyone.  And like so many good jokes, it's very close to the truth.


Gabor looks up on the Internet the cost of a tooth extraction in Pattaya. In a rage over what he reads, he prints out the post, walks into the dentist's office and shakes it angrily in the dentist's face.

"You greedy dental-clinic owner! You think I lame-dupe overpaying gullible newbie who can be mislead by sponsored fake post? I never pay 2,000 baht to pull fugly tooth!"

The dentist explained that was the standard charge and couldn't be reduced. Gabor then began to bargain.

 "Liar! Mental cripple liar! Was only 1,000 baht 15 years ago! How about you no use - how you say- stuff to make no ouch-ouch in mouth?"

 A tooth extraction without anesthesia would be extremely painful for the patient, but could be done for 1,750 baht. Gabor still wasn't satisfied and asked if he could have a further discount if the procedure was done quickly. "S/T or L/T, up to you."

The dentist explain a hurried procedure wouldn't produce a good result, but would cost 1,500 baht. Gabor pushed even harder.

 "Mental wanker loser! How about student assistant, not you, do it after office close? I give her noodle soup, too, make her very happy."

 The dentist explained a procedure under such circumstances would be extremely traumatic and painful for the patient and the results would most likely be terrible, but it could be done for 1,000 baht.

 "Fair and honest price!" Gabor said with a broad smile. "I make appointment for my Thai girlfriend to come tomorrow."

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This is not a joke as such but for some reason it just popped into my head and made me laugh at the time.

I was waiting behind three lady golfers to pay my green fee at some course near Hull, the name of which escapes me.

One of the ladies was a asking the guy in the golf shop several questions about the course and as soon as he answered the next question followed. Both he and I were getting just a touch frustrated.

Eventually they started to walk towards the exit when the guy called out

"Take care not to go into the dike on the third hole."

The door shut behind them and we both pissed ourselves laughing.

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