Lirchenfeld Posted January 20, 2023 Share Posted January 20, 2023 Father: Now the stork is coming with your new babysister Son: You are a bloody idiot, dad. The whole town is packed with pretty women but you are fucking the stork. -------- Mrs Jones is ringing the doorbell at her neighbour in hopes that she can borrow a cup of sugar. Mr. Peters opens the door: "Sure you can borrow a cup of sugar, and you know what it costs." Mrs Jones gets down on her knees and starts sucking his cock when you suddenly screams: "yuck, this tastes like shit" Mr. Peters replies: "Well, of course, your husband has just been here to borrow my screwdriver". -------------- Once i sent my clothes to the laundry shop with a small note attached to the collar of my shirt "Use more soap here" When I got the clean clothes back i noticed a small note attached to the back of my underwear "Use more paper here" ------------- Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?" Man: "Yes!" Reporter: "Name?" Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim." Reporter: "Sex?" Man: "Three to five times a week." Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?" Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel." Reporter: "Holy cow!" Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general." Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?" Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style." Reporter: "Oh dear!" Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch." ------------------- Two Men were out fishing when one decides to have a smoke He asks the other guy if he has a lighter He replies "Yes I do!" and hands the other a 10 inch long BIC lighter Surprised the guy asks "Where did you get this?" The guy replies "Oh I have a personal genie." The first man asks "Can I make a wish? " "Sure says the other man "Just make sure that you speak clearly cause he is a little hard at hearing" "Ok I will" says the other as he rubs the lamp a genie appears and asks the man what he wants The man says " I want a Million Bucks " The genie says OK and goes back to his bottle and 10 seconds later a million ducks fly over head And the guy says to the other " Your genie realy sucks at hearing doesnt he?" The other man replies "I know, do you really think I asked for a 10 inch BIC" --------- Daughter: "mom I have a date with the mail man" Mom: "but he could be your dad" Daughter: "Age doesn't matter" Mom: "I know, but that's not what i meant" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coxyhog Posted January 20, 2023 Share Posted January 20, 2023 (edited) Edited January 20, 2023 by coxyhog ?? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coxyhog Posted January 20, 2023 Share Posted January 20, 2023 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coxyhog Posted January 21, 2023 Share Posted January 21, 2023 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lirchenfeld Posted January 22, 2023 Share Posted January 22, 2023 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maipenrai Posted January 26, 2023 Share Posted January 26, 2023 2 1 2 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maipenrai Posted January 27, 2023 Share Posted January 27, 2023 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aqualung Posted January 27, 2023 Share Posted January 27, 2023 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tko Posted January 28, 2023 Share Posted January 28, 2023 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tko Posted January 30, 2023 Share Posted January 30, 2023 1 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KWA Posted January 30, 2023 Share Posted January 30, 2023 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aqualung Posted January 30, 2023 Share Posted January 30, 2023 (edited) Edited January 30, 2023 by Aqualung Add info Nicola Sturgeons holiday snap Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lazarus Posted February 1, 2023 Share Posted February 1, 2023 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maipenrai Posted February 1, 2023 Share Posted February 1, 2023 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KhunDon Posted February 1, 2023 Share Posted February 1, 2023 (edited) I was stood next to a coloured guy in the toilet and he flopped out a huge, long black dick. I said Christ! how did you get such a big dick. He said his mum used to tie a brick to it for an hour each day and that’s how it’s so big. I said to him, I’m gonna give that a go, so every day for a fortnight I’ve been walking round with a brick tied tightly to my John Thomas all day, thinking it’s going to work quicker if I do that. I met him again two weeks later and he asked me how it’s going. I said I think it’s working, it’s gone black. Edited February 1, 2023 by KhunDon 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
biggles Posted February 2, 2023 Share Posted February 2, 2023 A guy is in the men's toilet when a big black guy comes in. He sneaks a sideways peak at the guys equipment and sees a tattoo Wendy' What a coincidence he says, 'my girl is a Wendy as well' 'What you mean mon, it says Welcome to Jamaica and have a nice day' 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lirchenfeld Posted February 3, 2023 Share Posted February 3, 2023 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coxyhog Posted February 4, 2023 Share Posted February 4, 2023 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derek Dangleberries Posted February 5, 2023 Share Posted February 5, 2023 1 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KhunDon Posted February 5, 2023 Share Posted February 5, 2023 Japanese proverb: "All mushrooms are edible... Some only once”. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coxyhog Posted February 5, 2023 Share Posted February 5, 2023 Balloon espionage from Pattaya.... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coxyhog Posted February 5, 2023 Share Posted February 5, 2023 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coxyhog Posted February 5, 2023 Share Posted February 5, 2023 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
forqalso Posted February 6, 2023 Share Posted February 6, 2023 17 hours ago, Derek Dangleberries said: Here’s a picture of this guy and his wife, Scarlett Johansson. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aqualung Posted February 6, 2023 Share Posted February 6, 2023 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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